background picture from: robin good
Monday, June 18, 2007
Saturday, June 16, 2007
learn the art of "phantom-loving"
1. look
2. once in a while, glance
3. stare if he's not looking
4. gaze if nobody's staring
5. ogle but... no no no, don't!
6. think but don't assume. just keep it in your own world...
7. smile... it helps you release that insanity...
8. dream
9. dream
10. dream
11. dream
12. dream
13. dream
14. dream
15. dream
16. dream
17. dream
18. dream... only to find out
the last piece of the puzzle won't fit... ->torn<-
hell! he's just turning
__. and you're months older... laugh! fool, you've been fooled!
2. once in a while, glance
3. stare if he's not looking
4. gaze if nobody's staring
5. ogle but... no no no, don't!
6. think but don't assume. just keep it in your own world...
7. smile... it helps you release that insanity...
8. dream
9. dream
10. dream
11. dream
12. dream
13. dream
14. dream
15. dream
16. dream
17. dream
18. dream... only to find out
the last piece of the puzzle won't fit... ->torn<-
hell! he's just turning
__. and you're months older... laugh! fool, you've been fooled!
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
theo...
sem-ender papers are hard rocks on head plus all the mind-bogging tests and a lot more. all you need is bottle of beer! this was my last requirement for our last theology course, which had a great impact on my orientations and views. born out of our philisophical/radical beer-talks the night of my birthday, this contained my thoughts during that critical week...
Break the rules! That is how I can describe my flaming passion for life — break the rules in the sense that we should not always end up conforming to what the society and religion dictates. There are a lot of factors to consider but at least we have a chance to show our individuality and not let the system eat us alive.
Sometimes we get drowned with illusory figures of a perfect world and rectify ourselves to conform to the normal setting. But who, then, set the standards of normality? It may not be far from possible that what we cling into is not linear to our nature then we end up twisting our brains just to fit in. The world does not always tell the truth. We just have to know our nature, consider others’ and live with respect.
I believe action is human behavior to which the acting individual attaches subjective meaning and can be overt or inward and subjective. But by virtue of the subjective meaning attached to it by the acting individuals, action becomes social, and it takes account of the behavior of others and is thereby guided. My actions can be causally determined by the behavior of others, while still not necessarily being meaningfully determined by them. I am an individual and I am free, insofar as I am not disturbing the live of anybody or destroying the situation. I can always tell the world who I am, but I can never expect them to think the way I do because I respect individuality. The uniformity rests insofar as behavior is determined by purely rational actions of people to similar ulterior expectations. And in most cases, our actual action goes on in a state of inarticulate half-consciousness or actually unconsciousness of its subjective meaning. The ideal type case of meaning may be where meaning is fully conscious and explicit: this rarely happens in reality, and we have to deal with it.
I have to thank everyone for bringing back my person, which I thought I lost for a while. In my nineteen years of stay in these soils of "sorcerers and black pearls", it was only yesterday when, once more, I felt I was important, and as I start another year of struggle, my questions about existence now boil down to one answer, and that is respect.
Break the rules! That is how I can describe my flaming passion for life — break the rules in the sense that we should not always end up conforming to what the society and religion dictates. There are a lot of factors to consider but at least we have a chance to show our individuality and not let the system eat us alive.
Sometimes we get drowned with illusory figures of a perfect world and rectify ourselves to conform to the normal setting. But who, then, set the standards of normality? It may not be far from possible that what we cling into is not linear to our nature then we end up twisting our brains just to fit in. The world does not always tell the truth. We just have to know our nature, consider others’ and live with respect.
I believe action is human behavior to which the acting individual attaches subjective meaning and can be overt or inward and subjective. But by virtue of the subjective meaning attached to it by the acting individuals, action becomes social, and it takes account of the behavior of others and is thereby guided. My actions can be causally determined by the behavior of others, while still not necessarily being meaningfully determined by them. I am an individual and I am free, insofar as I am not disturbing the live of anybody or destroying the situation. I can always tell the world who I am, but I can never expect them to think the way I do because I respect individuality. The uniformity rests insofar as behavior is determined by purely rational actions of people to similar ulterior expectations. And in most cases, our actual action goes on in a state of inarticulate half-consciousness or actually unconsciousness of its subjective meaning. The ideal type case of meaning may be where meaning is fully conscious and explicit: this rarely happens in reality, and we have to deal with it.
I have to thank everyone for bringing back my person, which I thought I lost for a while. In my nineteen years of stay in these soils of "sorcerers and black pearls", it was only yesterday when, once more, I felt I was important, and as I start another year of struggle, my questions about existence now boil down to one answer, and that is respect.
Unrepentant 'Dr. Death' still favors right to die
Dr. Kevorkian also asserts other physicians help ill patients commit suicide
By John Springer
TODAYShow.com contributor
Updated: 8:20 a.m. PT June 5, 2007
Eight years in prison hasn't changed physician-assisted suicide advocate Jack Kevorkian's opinion that legislatures can prohibit doctors from helping chronically ill patients end their lives, but no man-made rule can ever take away a person's "natural right" to decide whether they wish to live or die.
"It is one of our natural rights that we are born with, the right to control the circumstances of one’s own death," Kevorkian, 79, told TODAY's Ann Curry on Tuesday during his first live television interview since being released from a Michigan prison last week.
"It can't be controlled by external forces and be a right," he told Curry. "The law can block your use of it. That doesn't mean they destroy the right."
The media starting calling Kevorkian "Dr. Death" even before several failed attempts by prosecutors in Michigan to send him to prison for murder during the 1990s. Prosecutors finally prevailed in 1999, winning a second-degree murder conviction against Kevorkian for the poisoning death the year before of 52-year-old Thomas Youk, who was suffering from advanced Lou Gehrig's disease. The assisted suicide aired on CBS's "60 Minutes."
Kevorkian has estimated that he participated in more than 130 assisted suicides before Michigan finally won a conviction and sentenced the pathologist to 10 to 25 years in prison.
He claims that the practice remains widespread, even if other physicians aren’t stepping forward as he did to advocate physician-assisted suicide so publicly and brazenly.
"What evidence do you have of that, sir?" Curry asked Kevorkian.
"There have been polls taken of doctors, anonymous polls," said Kevorkian, whose own license to practice medicine was revoked at the time he helped end Youk’s life. "I think more than half say they have done it before and 30 percent say they do it still."
No regrets
Although Kevorkian has said he will no longer participate in assisted suicides, he has no regrets about helping to end the life of patients whom he deemed to be suffering and beyond medical help, and who willingly chose to end their lives.
"If a doctor decides, 'Yes, it's true. This person has a serious disease. Yes, it's true. It looks like he's suffering. And, yes, it's true. There seems to be nothing that can help him' — the person has a natural right to request help by a competent professional in ending his life," Kevorkian said. "And the competent professional has a natural right to accede to that request and help him. Both of those rights [are] blocked by law, that's all. But that doesn't destroy the right."
Apparently, a majority of Americans agree.
A Gallup poll conducted last month found that 71 percent of Americans surveyed feel that doctors should be permitted to end the life of a chronically diseased patient when the patient and his or her family agree to it.
Kevorkian's attorney, Mayer Morganroth, who appeared on TODAY with him, said his client was always careful to satisfy himself completely that a patient seeking help in ending his or her life was mentally competent to make such a decision. "In any case where there was any doubt about mental capacity, Dr. Kevorkian had them referred to a psychiatrist and got a psychiatrist's report and analysis of the person's problems," Morganroth said.
According to the Web site euthanasia.com, 35 states have enacted statutes criminalizing assisted suicide and nine others bar it as a matter of common law. However, several states' courts have said assisted suicide is not a crime. Though Oregon is the only state to legalize physician-assisted suicide, California is considering a similar law with procedures physicians would be required to follow.
This article can be found in: www.msnbc.msn.com, segment: people
By John Springer
TODAYShow.com contributor
Updated: 8:20 a.m. PT June 5, 2007
Eight years in prison hasn't changed physician-assisted suicide advocate Jack Kevorkian's opinion that legislatures can prohibit doctors from helping chronically ill patients end their lives, but no man-made rule can ever take away a person's "natural right" to decide whether they wish to live or die.
"It is one of our natural rights that we are born with, the right to control the circumstances of one’s own death," Kevorkian, 79, told TODAY's Ann Curry on Tuesday during his first live television interview since being released from a Michigan prison last week.
"It can't be controlled by external forces and be a right," he told Curry. "The law can block your use of it. That doesn't mean they destroy the right."
The media starting calling Kevorkian "Dr. Death" even before several failed attempts by prosecutors in Michigan to send him to prison for murder during the 1990s. Prosecutors finally prevailed in 1999, winning a second-degree murder conviction against Kevorkian for the poisoning death the year before of 52-year-old Thomas Youk, who was suffering from advanced Lou Gehrig's disease. The assisted suicide aired on CBS's "60 Minutes."
Kevorkian has estimated that he participated in more than 130 assisted suicides before Michigan finally won a conviction and sentenced the pathologist to 10 to 25 years in prison.
He claims that the practice remains widespread, even if other physicians aren’t stepping forward as he did to advocate physician-assisted suicide so publicly and brazenly.
"What evidence do you have of that, sir?" Curry asked Kevorkian.
"There have been polls taken of doctors, anonymous polls," said Kevorkian, whose own license to practice medicine was revoked at the time he helped end Youk’s life. "I think more than half say they have done it before and 30 percent say they do it still."
No regrets
Although Kevorkian has said he will no longer participate in assisted suicides, he has no regrets about helping to end the life of patients whom he deemed to be suffering and beyond medical help, and who willingly chose to end their lives.
"If a doctor decides, 'Yes, it's true. This person has a serious disease. Yes, it's true. It looks like he's suffering. And, yes, it's true. There seems to be nothing that can help him' — the person has a natural right to request help by a competent professional in ending his life," Kevorkian said. "And the competent professional has a natural right to accede to that request and help him. Both of those rights [are] blocked by law, that's all. But that doesn't destroy the right."
Apparently, a majority of Americans agree.
A Gallup poll conducted last month found that 71 percent of Americans surveyed feel that doctors should be permitted to end the life of a chronically diseased patient when the patient and his or her family agree to it.
Kevorkian's attorney, Mayer Morganroth, who appeared on TODAY with him, said his client was always careful to satisfy himself completely that a patient seeking help in ending his or her life was mentally competent to make such a decision. "In any case where there was any doubt about mental capacity, Dr. Kevorkian had them referred to a psychiatrist and got a psychiatrist's report and analysis of the person's problems," Morganroth said.
According to the Web site euthanasia.com, 35 states have enacted statutes criminalizing assisted suicide and nine others bar it as a matter of common law. However, several states' courts have said assisted suicide is not a crime. Though Oregon is the only state to legalize physician-assisted suicide, California is considering a similar law with procedures physicians would be required to follow.
This article can be found in: www.msnbc.msn.com, segment: people
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
type my mood in lowercase
BUT I REALLY CAN'T!!! I'M NOT LIKING WHAT I'M FORCED TO DO! (IMAGINE ME DOING AN SMS - ALL CAPS FROM AN IRATE TEXTER!) EVERY NIGHT FEELS LIKE I'M BEING DRAGGED OUT OF BED, AND SHOWERS MAKE ME WONDER IF I'M REALLY SCRUBBING MY BODY WITH HARD,POINTED STONES THE EARTH COULD EVER IMAGINE BEARING! IF ONLY CAP ONE WERE NOT MOVED TO MARIKINA, THEN NO NEED FOR ME TO ASK FOR TRANSFER, EXCEPT FOR SOME UNEXPECTED SHIT OF COURSE, THE QA, TO NAME ONE...
Sunday, May 27, 2007
worth of a woman: not contained in any single-paged writing
i found this on our cap1 part-timers yg...
To All the Meantime Girls
She's the one you call when you're bored because she makes you laugh.
She's the one you talk to when you're feeling down because she's willing to lend an ear and be a friend.
She's not the one you call when you need
a date to your company's Christmas party, or to go dancing with on a Saturday night.
She's the one you spend time with
between girlfriends, before you find "The One".
You know, the one who you keep around in the
meantime.
She's not one of the guys, not a tomboy, but you
don't look at her as a "real" woman, either.
She's not bitchy enough, moody enough, or sexy
enough to be seen in that light.
She's too laid-back, too easily amused
by the same things your male buddies are amused by. She's too understanding, too comfortable - she doesn't make you feel nervous or excited the way a "real" woman does.
But she's cool, and nice, and funny, and attractive enough that when you're lonely or need intimate female companionship, she'll do
just fine.
You don't have to wine and dine her because she
knows the real you already, and you don't have any facades to keep up, no pretenses to preserve.
You're not trying to get anything of substance out of her.
She's not easy, but you know that she cares about you and is attracted to you, and
that she'll give you the intimacy you need. And you know you don't have to explain yourself or the situation, that she'll be able to cope with
the fact that this isn't the beginning of a
relationship or that there's any possibility that you have any real romantic feelings for her.
It won't bother her that you'll get up in the morning, put on your pants, say goodbye, and go on a date with the woman you've been mooning over for weeks who finally agreed to go out with you.
She'll settle for a goodbye hug and a promise to call her and tell her how the date went.
She's just so cool . . . why can't all women be like
that?!
But deep down, if you really think about it (which
you probably don't because to you, the situation between the two of you isn't important
enough to merit any real thought), you know that
it's really not fair.
You know that although she would never say it, it
hurts her to know that despite all her good points and all the fun you two have, you don't
think she's good enough to spend any real time
with.
Sure, it's mostly her fault, because she doesn't
have to give in to your needs - she could play the hard-to-get bitch like the rest of them do,
if she really wanted to. But you and she both know that she probably couldn't pull it off. Maybe she's too short, or a little overweight, or
has a big birthmark on her forehead, or works at Jollibee.
Whatever the reason, somehow life has given her a lot of really great qualities but
has left out the ones that men want (or think they want) in a woman.
So she remains forever the funny friend, the steadfast companion, the secret lover, and you go on searching for your goddess who will somehow
be everything you ever wanted in a woman.
You'll joke to her that she should be the best man at your wedding, and she'll laugh and make a joke about a smelly rental barong.
She doesn't captivate you with her beauty, or open doors with her smile.
Mainly she blends in with the crowd. She's safe.
She doesn't want to be
the center of attention and turn the heads of
everyone in the room. But
she wants to turn someone's head. She wants to
be special to someone,too. We all do.
She has feelings. She has a heart. In fact, she
probably has a bigger
and better heart than any woman you've ever
known because she's had a
front-row seat to The Mess That Is Your Life, and she likes you anyway.
She obviously sees something worthwhile and
redeeming in you because
although you've given her nothing, absolutely
there's no reason for her
to be with you but she still is.
Do you have a meantime girl or are you one?
To All the Meantime Girls
She's the one you call when you're bored because she makes you laugh.
She's the one you talk to when you're feeling down because she's willing to lend an ear and be a friend.
She's not the one you call when you need
a date to your company's Christmas party, or to go dancing with on a Saturday night.
She's the one you spend time with
between girlfriends, before you find "The One".
You know, the one who you keep around in the
meantime.
She's not one of the guys, not a tomboy, but you
don't look at her as a "real" woman, either.
She's not bitchy enough, moody enough, or sexy
enough to be seen in that light.
She's too laid-back, too easily amused
by the same things your male buddies are amused by. She's too understanding, too comfortable - she doesn't make you feel nervous or excited the way a "real" woman does.
But she's cool, and nice, and funny, and attractive enough that when you're lonely or need intimate female companionship, she'll do
just fine.
You don't have to wine and dine her because she
knows the real you already, and you don't have any facades to keep up, no pretenses to preserve.
You're not trying to get anything of substance out of her.
She's not easy, but you know that she cares about you and is attracted to you, and
that she'll give you the intimacy you need. And you know you don't have to explain yourself or the situation, that she'll be able to cope with
the fact that this isn't the beginning of a
relationship or that there's any possibility that you have any real romantic feelings for her.
It won't bother her that you'll get up in the morning, put on your pants, say goodbye, and go on a date with the woman you've been mooning over for weeks who finally agreed to go out with you.
She'll settle for a goodbye hug and a promise to call her and tell her how the date went.
She's just so cool . . . why can't all women be like
that?!
But deep down, if you really think about it (which
you probably don't because to you, the situation between the two of you isn't important
enough to merit any real thought), you know that
it's really not fair.
You know that although she would never say it, it
hurts her to know that despite all her good points and all the fun you two have, you don't
think she's good enough to spend any real time
with.
Sure, it's mostly her fault, because she doesn't
have to give in to your needs - she could play the hard-to-get bitch like the rest of them do,
if she really wanted to. But you and she both know that she probably couldn't pull it off. Maybe she's too short, or a little overweight, or
has a big birthmark on her forehead, or works at Jollibee.
Whatever the reason, somehow life has given her a lot of really great qualities but
has left out the ones that men want (or think they want) in a woman.
So she remains forever the funny friend, the steadfast companion, the secret lover, and you go on searching for your goddess who will somehow
be everything you ever wanted in a woman.
You'll joke to her that she should be the best man at your wedding, and she'll laugh and make a joke about a smelly rental barong.
She doesn't captivate you with her beauty, or open doors with her smile.
Mainly she blends in with the crowd. She's safe.
She doesn't want to be
the center of attention and turn the heads of
everyone in the room. But
she wants to turn someone's head. She wants to
be special to someone,too. We all do.
She has feelings. She has a heart. In fact, she
probably has a bigger
and better heart than any woman you've ever
known because she's had a
front-row seat to The Mess That Is Your Life, and she likes you anyway.
She obviously sees something worthwhile and
redeeming in you because
although you've given her nothing, absolutely
there's no reason for her
to be with you but she still is.
Do you have a meantime girl or are you one?
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
lost, yesterday, somewhere between sunrise and sunset, two golden hours, each set with sixty diamond minutes. no reward is offered, for they are gone forever...
-horace mann
there has never been any moment when humans were beyond the mercy of time. at some point of rush we often say there is none left, only to realize that where we are running and what we are chasing is time itself.
time, confined in my philosophy, is a system of measuring isolation... moments when we feel we lost ourselves to war and things unfathomable... and we let ourselves be guided by the earth. experience is our teacher; time is its master... runner's time, the rhythm and tempo characteristic - life told in something we call music.
neutral as time is indefinite, the entire period of the existence of humanity is tasted and defined by its three flavors: the past, the present, the future. every moment there has ever been or ever will be.
life. we give time the privilege to determine it by clock and calendar... by second, minute, hour, day, week, month, year. we may have regrets and what might have beens...
on one's hand, time is an interval with acting or having nothing to do...
out of mind, it is immemorial...
and when we look back, our memory always begins with, "there was a time."
Saturday, May 19, 2007
i killed my lover
three in the morning, the meeting of cross currents
minutes before, his gaze was mine
eyes bleeding as he studied me shiver
my only vice dressed my body black and blue
a fist i once adored, now the last claw
that scraped my body sweet
like that of saccharine, intoxicating
cloyingly sweet, in spirit and manner
he held me close, in his arms
tight, rivers cannot pass through...
i silently battled for the dagger
beside the open fire, behind his chest...
i no longer see my lover
but horns, black as silhouette
he must be ready to die and
i was ready to kill...
the dagger flew right next to my core
my hands were the pilot...
i knew he loved me
with this, i knew, he would die...
Thursday, May 17, 2007
seaside suicide...
the waters, clear and calm... it is when a human walks toward the seafloor that he becomes united with the elements of life: earth, water, wind, fire...
the pureness of sand
the sanctity of water
the perils of the wind
the brilliance of fire, fire within...
the next best thing is to unite with the divine, the quintessential...
Friday, May 04, 2007
haven of poetry
i just love it how Mario Eric Gamalinda, a native poet and the author of Las Ruinas del Corazon, does the writing. intellectual, passionate, melancholic, deep and sensible - even these are not enough to describe how i indulge in his poetry. his web site left me open-mouthed that the only thing i had told him in a message box was, "when i read your poetry, i just can't make my imaginations behave..."
this stole my attention yesterday. how beautiful it was!
Autoportrait in Black
I was so small the angels decided
not to give me a name. I lived
all my life in obscurity, except
once, when the cypresses applauded
my bravado. I knew the language
of birds, but they still refused
to reveal the harmonies to me.
I lost not one parent, but three.
At the same moment that I learned
love, a blue thunderbolt ripped
the sky open, and I went insane.
Midway in life I traveled through
six time zones, the past, the future,
and every satellite in between.
The words bounced off my tongue,
incandescent, warm. When I died
a megaton of light tore itself
out of my bones. I became pure
particle, a spy among opposing
magisteria. I became an iris, a stone.
This consciousness so dear to me
closed like a flower. I could not
resist the beauty of nothingness.
In my place another being came
to lodge, and I moved quickly
to give it room. I don't know if this
is joy, but my absence was joyful.
this stole my attention yesterday. how beautiful it was!
Autoportrait in Black
I was so small the angels decided
not to give me a name. I lived
all my life in obscurity, except
once, when the cypresses applauded
my bravado. I knew the language
of birds, but they still refused
to reveal the harmonies to me.
I lost not one parent, but three.
At the same moment that I learned
love, a blue thunderbolt ripped
the sky open, and I went insane.
Midway in life I traveled through
six time zones, the past, the future,
and every satellite in between.
The words bounced off my tongue,
incandescent, warm. When I died
a megaton of light tore itself
out of my bones. I became pure
particle, a spy among opposing
magisteria. I became an iris, a stone.
This consciousness so dear to me
closed like a flower. I could not
resist the beauty of nothingness.
In my place another being came
to lodge, and I moved quickly
to give it room. I don't know if this
is joy, but my absence was joyful.
Sunday, April 29, 2007
this i can't hide...
a poem for someone who ransoms my emotional drought, someone who taught me how to love a portrait...
Somewhere behind his smile
Akin to the depths of his soul, rests
My yearning, if he only knew...
Under the precept of heavenly gods,
Relieve the pains of my flaming passion!
Intoxicating, captivating as he is
Cursed with a perfect physique, and leaves
Endless waiting stealing my sanity...
I adore his humanity and sanctus
and everything that lies in between
My first glimpse of him was beyond recall
Yet here and now, his chassis
Is in no way thrown into oblivion...
My pleasure is to see him, i know nothing more
And heed me as i revere him, though i know
Not a chance will i fall out of this dream, only a dream...
Somewhere behind his smile
Akin to the depths of his soul, rests
My yearning, if he only knew...
Under the precept of heavenly gods,
Relieve the pains of my flaming passion!
Intoxicating, captivating as he is
Cursed with a perfect physique, and leaves
Endless waiting stealing my sanity...
I adore his humanity and sanctus
and everything that lies in between
My first glimpse of him was beyond recall
Yet here and now, his chassis
Is in no way thrown into oblivion...
My pleasure is to see him, i know nothing more
And heed me as i revere him, though i know
Not a chance will i fall out of this dream, only a dream...
Saturday, April 28, 2007
quotes from Hemingway...
"I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I'm awake, you know?"
"It is better to sleep on things beforehand than lie awake about them afterward."
"A few hours of mountain climbing turn a villain and a saint into two rather equal creature. Exhaustion is the shortest way to equality and fraternity, and liberty is added eventually by sleep."
"There are some things which cannot be learned quickly, and time, which is all we have, must be paid heavily for their acquiring. They are the very simplest things and because it takes a man's life to know them the little new that each man gets from life is very costly and the only heritage he has to leave."
"There is no friend as loyal as a book."
"Writing, at its best, is a lonely life. Organizations for writers palliate the writer's loneliness, but I doubt if they improve his writing. He grows in public stature as he sheds his loneliness and often his work deteriorates. For he does his work alone and if he is a good enough writer he must face eternity, or the lack of it, each day."
"There are events which are so great that if a writer has participated in them his obligation is to write truly rather than assume the presumption of altering them with invention."
- http://www.quotedb.com/quotes
"It is better to sleep on things beforehand than lie awake about them afterward."
"A few hours of mountain climbing turn a villain and a saint into two rather equal creature. Exhaustion is the shortest way to equality and fraternity, and liberty is added eventually by sleep."
"There are some things which cannot be learned quickly, and time, which is all we have, must be paid heavily for their acquiring. They are the very simplest things and because it takes a man's life to know them the little new that each man gets from life is very costly and the only heritage he has to leave."
"There is no friend as loyal as a book."
"Writing, at its best, is a lonely life. Organizations for writers palliate the writer's loneliness, but I doubt if they improve his writing. He grows in public stature as he sheds his loneliness and often his work deteriorates. For he does his work alone and if he is a good enough writer he must face eternity, or the lack of it, each day."
"There are events which are so great that if a writer has participated in them his obligation is to write truly rather than assume the presumption of altering them with invention."
- http://www.quotedb.com/quotes
Friday, April 27, 2007
a flight of fancy
just when the night was about to come down
she found, from the holy rains of diety,
the harmony of mythos and veniality,
a reproduction of that
who was loved by aphrodite
a Latinized visage,
without defect or ommission and
who was, usually one of high birth
pledged to chivalrous demeanor
she lured herself from the mildness,
docility of the luscious resonance
proximal within somatic reach
but a fortress of fine edge,
sharp, more often implied
a harsh cutting quality
permitted her to discern
her feet were not on the same earth anymore...
intense addiction: samurice
she found, from the holy rains of diety,
the harmony of mythos and veniality,
a reproduction of that
who was loved by aphrodite
a Latinized visage,
without defect or ommission and
who was, usually one of high birth
pledged to chivalrous demeanor
she lured herself from the mildness,
docility of the luscious resonance
proximal within somatic reach
but a fortress of fine edge,
sharp, more often implied
a harsh cutting quality
permitted her to discern
her feet were not on the same earth anymore...
intense addiction: samurice
Thursday, April 26, 2007
read and digest... these may help
1.Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers. (Voltaire, 1694-1778)
2.Without music life would be a mistake. (Friedrich Nietzsche, 1844-1900)
3.Wonder is the feeling of a philosopher, and philosophy begins in wonder. (Socrates, 470?-339 BC)
4.To read without reflecting is like eating without digesting. (Edmund Burke, 1729-1797)
5.The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read them. (Mark Twain, 1835-1910)
6.Don't go around saying the world owes you a living; the world owes you nothing, it was here first. (Mark Twain, 1835-1910)
7.There is more to life than increasing its speed. (Mahatma Gandhi, 1869-1948)
8.Wise men don't need advice. Fools don't take it. (Ben Franklin, 1706-1790)
9.If your head is wax, don't walk in the sun. (Ben Franklin, 1706-1790)
10.Make haste slowly. (Ben Franklin, 1706-1790)
11.Do not use a hatchet to remove a fly from your friend's forehead. (Chinese proverb)
12.Never put anything bigger than your elbow in your ear. (Anonymous)
13.Don't let the sun go down on a debt or a quarrel. (Anonymous)
14.Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check. (Anonymous)
15.Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor. (Francis Bacon, 1561-1626)
16.He that lives upon hope will die fasting. (Ben Franklin, 1706-1790)
17.Be in general virtuous, and you will be happy. (Ben Franklin, 1706-1790)
18.The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you're still a rat. (Lily Tomlin, 1939- )
19.No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. (Eleanor Roosevelt, 1884-1962)
20.Life was meant to be lived, and curiosity must be kept alive. One must never, for whatever reason, turn his back on life. (Eleanor Roosevelt, 1884-1962)
21.Lost time is never found again. (Benjamin Franklin, 1706-90)
22.Don't look back. Something may be gaining on you. (Satchel Paige, 1906-82)
23.There is no substitute for hard work. (Thomas Edison, 1847-1931)
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
labor day: additional labor for laborers
this applies only for those who spend this holiday at streets, shouting, fighting for fellow laborers' rights, because for those who slightly feel the oppression of the government, this will naturally be a rest day.
no permit, no rally:
queer. why ask for a permit? it's just like asking for your parents' permission to shout against them and insist your own rules. the reason why it's called a rally is that it is a breakout to recover public strength, to summon or bring persons together for a common purpose and bring them back to action: revive, and knock on the gates of the state leaders to remind them that the society still kills.
not all people languish under the draining sunbeam but everybody profits. then people condemn them...
no permit, no rally:
queer. why ask for a permit? it's just like asking for your parents' permission to shout against them and insist your own rules. the reason why it's called a rally is that it is a breakout to recover public strength, to summon or bring persons together for a common purpose and bring them back to action: revive, and knock on the gates of the state leaders to remind them that the society still kills.
not all people languish under the draining sunbeam but everybody profits. then people condemn them...
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
thoughts to ponder: borrowed thoughts from few good thinkers
--title borrowed from my cousin
i would like to make myself believe that the world is still inhabited by people who cultivate its lands by merely living as authentic human occupants...
"...her beauty reminds me there is a God, nothing as perfect as her could have happened by chance"-- adrian, my cousin's bf
"jealousy permits you to think that the reason why you get annoyed is that you couldn't and wouldn't do how that 'fUcKin' biAtCh' do the flirting!"-- my friend jaycee
"when we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. a friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness"-- some testimonial in friendster
"the more people i kill, the farther from home i feel"-- capt. miller, saving private ryan
1. "people expect you to maintain a level of winning or at least transcend it. but sometimes we lose, and peolple don't get that!"
2. "he who witnesses a crime in silence commits it"
3. "after being rejected, just save some dignity for yourself!"
4. "God determined man to be indeterminate."
-- sir emer
"what's wrong with being number two?!"-- morrie
"charity is not a debt of gratitude nor debt itself. it is what is due to them- a right that the society fails to provide"-- sir pabs
"could it be, that if we really understood death we would see it as the deepest healing of all? is death the great healing? is our life on earth partially a wound that death finally heals?"-- macrina weiderkehr
teka, ako din dapat bida! haha!!
tanong ko lang,
-why is third time always called stupidity?
-why do we have to submit ourselves to systems? education and labor are cults that leave us no choice but ride the wagon.
-why do we strictly care about what others will think of us? they do not make our lives! we have our own self-project and they, too, have their own lives and problems. they care less about us.
-why are we all afraid to say "i love" you toward a person the moment we feel it? yes, restrictions are often considered, but did we ever make it an excuse that the feeling might be gone tomorrow? it's momentary. we just have to let them know. no issues, no friendships broken. thing is, we just can't...
-how can we afford to suspend bliss for people's remarks? real happiness is always a one-time offer. its escape is always expected.
-why do we sometimes let people decide for ourselves, directly and not? we are the ones who suffer the consequences and all they give is sympathy. they just talk and talk, and we swallow the pain.
i would like to make myself believe that the world is still inhabited by people who cultivate its lands by merely living as authentic human occupants...
"...her beauty reminds me there is a God, nothing as perfect as her could have happened by chance"-- adrian, my cousin's bf
"jealousy permits you to think that the reason why you get annoyed is that you couldn't and wouldn't do how that 'fUcKin' biAtCh' do the flirting!"-- my friend jaycee
"when we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. a friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness"-- some testimonial in friendster
"the more people i kill, the farther from home i feel"-- capt. miller, saving private ryan
1. "people expect you to maintain a level of winning or at least transcend it. but sometimes we lose, and peolple don't get that!"
2. "he who witnesses a crime in silence commits it"
3. "after being rejected, just save some dignity for yourself!"
4. "God determined man to be indeterminate."
-- sir emer
"what's wrong with being number two?!"-- morrie
"charity is not a debt of gratitude nor debt itself. it is what is due to them- a right that the society fails to provide"-- sir pabs
"could it be, that if we really understood death we would see it as the deepest healing of all? is death the great healing? is our life on earth partially a wound that death finally heals?"-- macrina weiderkehr
teka, ako din dapat bida! haha!!
tanong ko lang,
-why is third time always called stupidity?
-why do we have to submit ourselves to systems? education and labor are cults that leave us no choice but ride the wagon.
-why do we strictly care about what others will think of us? they do not make our lives! we have our own self-project and they, too, have their own lives and problems. they care less about us.
-why are we all afraid to say "i love" you toward a person the moment we feel it? yes, restrictions are often considered, but did we ever make it an excuse that the feeling might be gone tomorrow? it's momentary. we just have to let them know. no issues, no friendships broken. thing is, we just can't...
-how can we afford to suspend bliss for people's remarks? real happiness is always a one-time offer. its escape is always expected.
-why do we sometimes let people decide for ourselves, directly and not? we are the ones who suffer the consequences and all they give is sympathy. they just talk and talk, and we swallow the pain.
i am deceased
my soul was captured by the ills
of emptied shell and broken vessel
buried down the earths of yesterday
my history is just a shadow
a silver tint in the frame of my humanity
my youth was killed and burned to ashes
and vanished along the perils of the wind
what i was yesterday, i know no more
it was a reflection of my reverse
an inanimate whose dreams were stolen
churned in a particular cycle of absurdity and greed
i was my own guillotine
i wept under the blades of tensions and tortures
and rudeness of the hike to intellectual riches
i had it before... i had them all before...
yesterday ended last night
it perished along with all my might
those dreams died and crashed to the ground
and i just learned it too late when then night came down
my soul was captured by the ills
of emptied shell and broken vessel
buried down the earths of yesterday
my history is just a shadow
a silver tint in the frame of my humanity
my youth was killed and burned to ashes
and vanished along the perils of the wind
what i was yesterday, i know no more
it was a reflection of my reverse
an inanimate whose dreams were stolen
churned in a particular cycle of absurdity and greed
i was my own guillotine
i wept under the blades of tensions and tortures
and rudeness of the hike to intellectual riches
i had it before... i had them all before...
yesterday ended last night
it perished along with all my might
those dreams died and crashed to the ground
and i just learned it too late when then night came down
a journey of pain
i walked into the garden of wild dreams and pushed myself into the thorny bushes to reach its heart. then i felt a sudden gush of blood dripping down my face. i asked myself what it was and realized that my forehead was scourged as i pressed in. it was as if my body was painted with blood and water in small slashes of pointed stalks. skin was cut into two and some flesh was screaming out. nevertheless, it wasn't that painful. was it because i had become so vulnerable to pain that i am now unable to distinguish bliss from distress? numb, i say. well, answers never come quickly, and i cared not to ponder on it anymore.
humid was violent, it made my walk a little exhausting since it was hard to manage a scorching walk and the whirl of biting memories enshrined in your heart. my eyes began to grow teary but no defense made the tears fall. then i stopped and started to wonder... where do fallen tears go after the dark moment of tranquility? apart from its physical composition, let me know where they lead were they unable to land on someone else's shoulder and wash away the excruciating pain you hardly bear. how do we tell that a good cry was enough to throw away all the anguish one deeply hides?
still, i walked, i pushed through...
at last i was there, but the heart of the garden did not give me any answer...
and now the journey begins... once more...
humid was violent, it made my walk a little exhausting since it was hard to manage a scorching walk and the whirl of biting memories enshrined in your heart. my eyes began to grow teary but no defense made the tears fall. then i stopped and started to wonder... where do fallen tears go after the dark moment of tranquility? apart from its physical composition, let me know where they lead were they unable to land on someone else's shoulder and wash away the excruciating pain you hardly bear. how do we tell that a good cry was enough to throw away all the anguish one deeply hides?
still, i walked, i pushed through...
at last i was there, but the heart of the garden did not give me any answer...
and now the journey begins... once more...
Saturday, April 21, 2007
"punk cakes" in the morning: good with some play
nothing beats hot pancakes for breakfast! much better when you eat them with bare hands. up one goes and slides down in a saucer of slowly-melting butter, heading for a shower of sugar sprinkles and a tub of milk creamer. yummy!
no one stops you from laying your artistic hands on them...
think:
a) 2pcs; 1 tiny pack of butter; an unlimited supply of maple syrup, you can even play with it or take some in a small plastic tube
--> costs P35 at McDonald's + P20 reg drinks
b) number depends on how starving you are; XX number of 225g butter from your kitchen; maple syrup taken home from McDo, sugar, milk creamer
--> maya hotcake mix: P28 (mother allots for gas, butter, sugar and milk)
no one stops you from laying your artistic hands on them...
think:
a) 2pcs; 1 tiny pack of butter; an unlimited supply of maple syrup, you can even play with it or take some in a small plastic tube
--> costs P35 at McDonald's + P20 reg drinks
b) number depends on how starving you are; XX number of 225g butter from your kitchen; maple syrup taken home from McDo, sugar, milk creamer
--> maya hotcake mix: P28 (mother allots for gas, butter, sugar and milk)
Friday, April 20, 2007
touch and go
yesterday's shift would be one of the saddest moments we had in cap1. the verdict: more than 2/3 of the part-timer team had to transfer to ICT Marikina and the rest, although it was favorable to stay, had to undergo retraining for a more hectic program--the consultative.
when, who, heck! that was our initial reactions but never had it gone through our imaginations that it was already planned that night. it was like we were just talking about this junk then all of a sudden the decision was announced and it was hell!
they said it was because cap1 was growing and that we need more space to occupy. cap1 was growing and it made us grow apart, just in time when we knew ourselves better... gonna miss them like hell!!
those were the days...
when, who, heck! that was our initial reactions but never had it gone through our imaginations that it was already planned that night. it was like we were just talking about this junk then all of a sudden the decision was announced and it was hell!
they said it was because cap1 was growing and that we need more space to occupy. cap1 was growing and it made us grow apart, just in time when we knew ourselves better... gonna miss them like hell!!
those were the days...
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