why does 28 always have to be a lonely day?

i don't know. all i know is just it's too boring to drink all alone on a 28.

walk the talk

this is an email shared by Niko Papasideris, a not-so-new indie recording artist from Nashville, TN, whom i met on MySpace some years ago. i admit, i do not entirely agree with the wordplay, but hey, it's another way of looking at the road ahead!

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Why I Have No Goals
Roy H. Williams

"Goal," in my experience, is a favorite word of people who talk and dream and dream and talk. And then they get together to "network" with other talkers. There's always a lot of noise in these meetings but it's unlikely that anything of consequence is going to happen. People who chatter about goals are rarely willing to die on that mountain.

I have no goals. But I do have plans.

A plan puts you in motion toward a destination. The destination you choose is irrelevant. It is (1.) motion, (2.) determination and (3.) commitment that separate destination-reaching explorers from goal-setting chipmunks.

Count the cost, explorer. "Am I willing to die on this mountain?"

A goal without a plan is wishful thinking.
A plan without action is self-delusion.

Here are three questions I'd like to ask:

1. What are you trying to make happen?
2. How will you measure success?
3. What's the first thing you need to do to get started?

no more tagay for me?

i can't believe it, but my vice is taking its toll on me this early. i miss my bad-ass alcohol tolerance because now it only takes a week of stress and three hours of unlimited shots to knock me dead. my lungs are also getting weaker. i was not like this before.

i know i'm not 100% healthy and that i should be taking medications of some freakin' sort, but i just don't think i can give up my vice/s at once and go cold turkey. god can i imagine it sending me fatal seizures! but the thing is, now i have to do it in moderation, else i'll wreck my nerves and go all the way six feet below the ground. (mmm.. why is it always six? why not seven or eight?)

if there is any absurd principle behind this equally absurd thinking, that would be the love of life. yes, i love being alive, however ridiculous it may sound, and i don't want to spend my entire life worrying about things, so i'd rather do anything that affords enjoyment whenever i feel like doing it. i'm going to die early, anyway. but of course i am also familiar with the word "control" and i know when to hit that "moderate button" on. i'm still not worrying that much, but i'm starting to feel something funny in my body, plus my eyebags have sagged down the floor—it's the final bitch slap!

in the course of wandering

memory, too, is made of water. earth is both hard and malleable, air fills all space. but water, in taking the shape of the vessel it occupies, is of infinite shape.
because memory encompasses all elements, it, too, is eternal, it includes both origin and destination, the past and the future.

-Rio Alma